i know it harms and i know its bad... but how could i ever try to stop myself from doing something that makes me feel better?


sometimes, i want to do it so badly but my mind tells me not too.
sometimes, im just too scared to do it because deep down i know its harmful.
as i look at the tiny scars on my wrist, i ask myself, are they worth the pain?
to be honest, i think they do?
They hurt, a lot, but at least they remind me that i do and can feel pain?
sometimes i feel as if im at the bottom of the pit with no one. no one at all.
I feel lonely, even when im surrounded with people.
I try, so very hard, but i dont think anyone knows or acknowledges...
I feel like this is all a facade, im putting on a mask.
How does one expect me to be confident, when im the one standing at the back? when im the one thats not good enough?

The wounds are swollen now and they hurt more than they did at first, and i ask myself, are they worth the pain?
Yes, they still do.
The pain numbs the feeling that i have in my heart
When i look at the scars that are left, i feel a sense of joy, I am touched.

I want to have someone that i can share all my secrets, all my ups and my downs, my tears, my attitude.
Most of all, i want someone who stays
who never leaves
despite everything or anything
I hope i find someone like that





























..... the scars....
they're not permanent.
but they are, in our hearts......